Posted by: Kate | February 11, 2010

Holding our Breath

When Norman died last year, it was a sad and heart-hurting time.

The memorial was a nightmare, and we’ve done our grieving in different ways, apart from that. The one good thing that came from the memorial was an afternoon with Grandma Ann, some time to hear her talk and see her smile. I wish we had brought a video camera, because her Long Island accent is priceless.

We’ll be heading down to see her tomorrow, but I won’t bring the video camera. I will bring the regular camera, because some moments are worth capturing, even when they hurt.

Because she’s not well. She’s in the hospital, having fallen out of bed and opened a large gash on her head… and once they got her there, they discovered a number of other problems, kidney and liver failure, fluid in her lungs, and so on, and the doctors stopped smiling, stopped talking about discharge planning.

So we’ll be making the trip down, with the mindset that this is our time to say good-bye. We’ve done it before, when my Grandma O died, and it’s a sad and hard thing to do. To see someone who was so robust, lying in a hospital bed with tubes and medications and dull eyes, it hurts. But it’s all a part of life, and she’s just as much Grandma now as she was when she was healthy.

So, we’ll go, and smile, and visit a little. And we’ll wait.


  1. This made me teary. Kate, I already said the rest elsewhere, but hugs for you, too:


  2. I’m so sorry Kate.

  3. Oh, Kate, I’m so sorry. I’m just glad that you will have a chance to say goodbye before she leaves you.

  4. So sorry, Kate. I hope it goes as well as can be expected.

  5. I am so sorry to hear this, and am sending prayers and positive thoughts your way!

  6. Thinking of you all.

  7. Thinking of you and your family and wishing you peace and strength.

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