Posted by: Kate | September 11, 2009

Pants Are Optional

My youngest sister just recently started college in upstate New York, and my other sister is back for her second year of grad school about an hour away from her.  We’ve recently begun texting each other as a primary means of communication, because Mary doesn’t have long distance (I didn’t even know cell phones came that way, nowadays) and it’s a lot easier than trying to mesh up our schedules.  Neither of them is up at 6:00 in order to shovel kids onto a school bus, and a good thing, too.

But simply sending text messages back and forth would get boring quick, right?  So, Mary started the game (“It’s not my fault, Mom!  She started it!”) of texting via haiku.  And it’s fun enough that I might just take this on as a permanent activity, at least with those willing to play…

My favorite pair so far starts with Mary’s response to a question that I had; we’re going to the Cirque du Soleil performance of Allegria in Syracuse tonight, and among other things to prepare, I need to pack clothing.  So I wrote asking for advice, what should I wear at the show?  Mary’s response:

They wear something bright / most of all comfortable / pants are optional

So I replied:

“pants are optional” / may just be the best line in / haiku history

Sarah has played along, too… her response to the same question:

So happy! can’t wait – wear a toga or a cape – my phone has no slash

So, good times.  Willem and I spent most of the evening last night communicating in haiku form.  He can count to 5-7-5 much faster than I can, and I think he plans out the meter before he speaks.  I, on the other hand, decide on what it is I want to say, laboriously count out the syllables, and then juggle around the words to make it fit.

My wife is a bitch / and she’s high-maintenance too / Good thing she is deaf

(He had much less obnoxious ones, too, but that’s the only one I can remember today.)

Once you start thinking / in haiku parameter / it is hard to stop

I’m aware that it’s / September 11th / but am beyond words



  1. Haiku is classic
    If I didn’t work today
    I’d do it all day


  2. Haikus don’t make sense
    Only syllables matter

  3. A proper haiku
    Has 17 syllables
    Fuck that

  4. Sisters who Haiku
    Could be a book in the make
    called Pants for Mary

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