Posted by: Kate | June 20, 2009

Rain Delay

I have a fairly thoroughly thought-out pose in my head, but want to sleep on it before I decide to publish.   Not due to any self-doubts about the content or message therein, but because I think it requires some careful wording, and right now I’m exhausted and overstimulated and chock full of various thoughts and emotions.  I’ll sleep a bit, and hope that my mental thesaurus is in better working order tomorrow.

In the meantime, I ask you this:  if someone asked you to take down your blog, someone you held in high personal regard until about 8 hours ago, would you do it?  What if they demanded you take it down, or edit old posts (I’m not really clear on the precise demand)?  What if they threatened you to never mention them again on your blog, even though there’s no actual consequence that could arise from said threat?

What would it take for you to shut it all down?

(And, no.  I’m not taking it down, or editing old posts, or making promises as to future ones.  I was asked to do all of the above today, and decided that was neither necessary nor in my best interest, and would not fix the actual, larger, underlying problems.  But still, it’s food for thought…)

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Responses

  1. Well, we’d miss you a whole lot. And I’m not sure what kind of dynamic that would create- probably not a comfortable one for anyone….

  2. My intital reaction to a demand of that sort would be, “Who are you to tell me what I can write/say?” After thinking about it, I would also come to the conclusion that the blog isn’t the problem and taking it down wouldn’t solve the real problem. Needless to say, I wouldn’t take it down, and I’m really glad you haven’t decided to do that.

  3. Tough one. It’s your & your family’s story. No one else’s. If Willem, Emily & Jacob are okay with it, no one else should matter.

  4. I would only take it down if I felt like a member of our family might be in danger if I left it up. If the person isn’t a threat then I would carry on as you have been.

  5. I’ve been reading here a long time and as far as I can tell, you have not shared any details that go beyond reasonable to tell the story and never have I read anything that just went too far here (like very specific details or identifiable clues to someone’s identity). This probably doesn’t make any sense – I’ve only been up for a short time. But, no, I would never delete my blog on anyone’s demand.

  6. Absolutely not, I would not comply with that demand. And it’s not an acceptable request since the blog is a part of you and how you express yourself.

  7. What’s their fear about what the blog says? Exposure of what kind? I’d dig deeper into their reasons, if only to bring out more discussion than a demand.

  8. That’s a good question. Honestly, I would say no. A blog is personal, and whether someone reads it or not is a personal choice. As it is your personal choice whether to update or not. From what I can tell, people who ask you to do something that you wouldn’t normally consider doing, want something for themselves. If you agree, they have proven that they can control you; if you don’t agree, they they have “proven their point” about you. Either way, there seems to be no way to win this.

    If you choose to take down your blog, that is your choice. If someone else asks you to take it down, that is their wish, what they want YOU to do. As Mick always says, “you can’t always get what you want.”

  9. I absolutely would not delete my blog at the insistence of someone. I don’t tend to respond well to demands. Now, to respect someone’s privacy I would either keep them out of future posts or change their name. It’s your blog. If you are comfortable with what you share then you should continue on as you have been.

  10. ?????

  11. I wouldn’t. My response (in my head) would be (although I’m not sure I would be bold enough to say it out loud): “If you don’t like it, don’t read it.”


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