Posted by: Kate | June 24, 2008

Stapling Impaired

Am I the only one who finds staplers to be a cruel joke in the ongoing efforts to look professional and organized? 

I can do mountains of paperwork, type quickly and accurately, sign illegibly but consistently, create neat little stacks of paper with paper clips and labels, wrap it all up in a crisp, yellowish, enormous envelope… but at least half the time, the stapler jams, or misfires, or penetrates only halfway through the six pages I want to attach, or in some other way causes my day to get worse. 

Then I have to pull it out, either breaking a nail or poking a hole in my skin or tearing the paper, and I try again, and sometimes I get to repeat the process three or four times before my final product sits, crumpled and chewed up, ready to be embarrassingly delivered.

Automatic staplers are much more consistent, but I have a sneaking suspicion that they’re in communication with their manual brethren and are just waiting for me to let my guard down before they latch onto my hand and gnaw.



  1. That used to happen to me all the time, to the extent I´d ask other people to staple things for me. Then I learnt that the only way I personally can use a normal stapler is if it is on top of a table and I´m standing up when I press down. Amazingly, it works!


    it must be genetic.

  3. yeah i have a hard time with staplers too but i thought that was just me.

    does anybody else think they look kind of menacing?

  4. Absoolutely! I’m an office goil and now have a shiny black INDUSTRIAL stapler. Works through 12 sheets of paper if I bang hard enough! (only to realise that I’ve stapled the wrong corner Doh!)

  5. The same stapler is not consistent either. You can sneak up and smash it with a book or you can push firmly but ever so gently. It’s still capricious.

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