Posted by: Kate | February 29, 2008

Leap Year

The Leap Day thing doesn’t actually have a whole lot of personal significance to me.  One of Willem’s ex-girlfriends, the particularly unpredictable weird unhealthy one, claimed to have been born on Leap Day, which is technically possible since she was born in 1976, but I just have doubts.  Lots of them.  Boatloads.

Otherwise, I know no Leap Day babies, and have always found the “only one birthday every four years” a tad exasperating and oversimplifying.  Sure, you get to say you’ve only had eight birthdays, but that does not make you eight years old.  Unless you continue to push the issue, and then I’ll have my doubts about your developmental age, just to make you happy.

But the word “leap” seems appropriate, as I have a handful of small things, largely unrelated, to throw out there.

Like, I’m at work today, physically in the office.  Not thrilled about it but not angst-filled, either; it’s just a (new and annoying) part of the job.  I brought knitting, so I’m entertained in between calls.  I’ve been playing around online a bit, but the connection is slow and unpredictable. 

It’s very, extremely rare that Perfect J decides to take on any voluntary overtime shifts, but recently she has started taking the occasional Friday.  It’s rare enough for her that I wonder what she’s up to.  So after allowing her to have the office to herself on Tuesday and Wednesday for all that busy, busy, busy, important work that she says she does all day that forces her to stay right here all the time, I decided to pull rank as the official primary staff on call for the day.  I arrived before she did this morning, got all set up at “her” desk (theoretically, we all share it, but realistically she’s the one who uses it most), and stayed put. 

She came wandering in a bit later, and stopped short with the precise look that my cat had a few years ago when our neighbors cut down her favorite nail-sharpening tree.  Scurry, scurry to the spot, get ready, and… nothing.  In the words of Eddie Izzard, “Oh, um… oh.”  So Perfect J got to sit in the corner for a bit and see how she likes it.  Turns out, not very much – within an hour she was off to do errands or something while we wait for a call.  Uh huh.

In other news, I chatted with my mom for a while last night.  How many other people have comfortable enough boundaries with their mothers that they can actively and in-detail discuss their own plans to try to conceive and her history thereof?

I’ve been, as may be painfully clear, very wrapped up in the thoughts and emotions around fertility, trying to remind myself that a first-cycle success is not particularly likely and perhaps I need to lay off the intense emotions for a bit.  But at the same time, I’ve been wrapped up in worries and concerns for a few other friends, all with relevant issues, themselves.  One is facing a major health crisis and in certain ways, it feels like we’re riding on trains moving on the same track, in opposite directions – I’m making plans that involve my life partner and are geared specifically toward procreation, he’s living a life that, for the time being, requires avoidance of all things sexual and nasty existential doubt about what the long-term holds in store.  I can’t think of anyone for whom his situation would be entirely fair and just – well, OK, not true, I can think of a few offenders and just plan jerks whose similar affliction wouldn’t keep me up at night – but here’s a decent guy who shouldn’t be worried about anything more pressing than how to stretch th next paycheck long enough to go on a nice date. 

Another friend’s marriage is falling apart, and I’m not sure how far it can fall before it breaks into pieces.  Another friend is facing infertility, and two others have faced it and come to terms with it.  It’s back to that survivor guilt I give myself, I suppose, that wondering of why me, how come I get the good stuff this time? 

But whatever.  I’m honestly not as introspective and intense as this all comes across today, just feeling a bit random and it takes a lot of words to deal with random. 

And to round it all out, I am so unspeakably sick of the weather.  We have between three and four feet of standing snow in our yard, plus seven- or eight-foot snowbanks at the end of the driveway, with another six inches predicted overnight.  Enough, already.  Willem won’t buy a snowblower, and time and energy are short these days, so our driveway keeps getting narrower and narrower.  I have a friend who is coming here in a week to leave her car while they go to Florida, and I’ll have to call a plow to make space – and I’m not 100% confident a plow can handle it.  Gretchen and I wanted to go on a yarn crawl up through Maine tomorrow, and it’s looking like that would be an exercise in stupidity and iciness.  Maybe we’ll go get pedicures instead.

I just went through and assigned categories to this post, and realized that if I find a way to squeeze in two more topics, travel and crafts, then I can use every durn one.  OK, then.  Crafts-wise, I completed a scarf for Carolyn last weekend, which has been photographed and delivered, and I’ll post said photographs plus a pattern online soon.  Just as soon as I can figure out where I found the stitch pattern.  I’ve also finished the knitting on what was supposed to be a baby sweater, but my gauge was ridiculously far off.  So it’s about a 2-3T size, still vey cute, and I’ll throw together some newborn hats and bibs to round it out.  And I just cast on for a pair of socks for my mom; I found a new hand-dyed sock yarn by Trekking in a colorway called “Jamaika” – seems only appropriate, but she doesn’t knit so I thought I’d help.

Travel?  We’re leaving for Florida in two weeks, and in three weeks I will be in Jamaica, basking in my childless beach time.  I’d be jealous, too, if you were going instead.

See?  Random.  Wheeeeeeeee.

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Responses

  1. Hey random is nice, very nice. Congrats on using all of the categories.
    I would have loved to hear the “tic-tic-tic” in Perject J’s head when she saw you sitting at HER desk! 😀 Ok I guess I am mean.
    On a note aboutthe weather, as always you are always welcome to shuffle on down to the Grand Canyon State and hang out by the pool with us…shoot there are enough houses for sale on my block you could buy your own for under $200K (with a pool.)
    Baby Making, it is easy to conceive in “bliss” if you aren’t getting too emotionally charged.

  2. Kind of hard to go to the bathroom in your office, PJ might be lurking around the corner, waiting to reclaim her throne.
    If she complains about the inequities of it all loud and long enough to Curmudgeon, you may return to the old days. Or, they may get more desks.
    Enough time goes by and it won’t really matter, will it?

  3. I’d wish you sun & rain to wash all that snow away, but then we’d need a place to park the canoe…

    And I have two friends I sent “Happy 9th Birthday” messages to today! One is throwing himself a party at a bar tonight. I think it’d be pretty funny if he was barred for being underage! =D

  4. Haha I love the randomness! I have so much going on in my head its hard to stay focussed sometimes. I draft posts full of this sort of stuff then leave them as drafts because they’re about 50 pages long. Obviously too much time on my hands. Keep standing your ground at work and try not to think about conception, just let it come naturally!


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